Non Veg. Jokes Part - 11

Zindagi bari Udaas Hai

Mujhe Lagi Pyaas Hai

Mujhe Duniya Se Na Koi Aas Hai

Mein Uski Gaand Phardonga

Jisne Kaha K Mere JOKES Bakwas Hai

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sardar was watching a xxx film, he saw his wife in the film who is being fucked.after the film ended he said thanks God that it was just a film.....

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Unborn twins in the mother’s stomach saw a penis.
1st Baby: Dekh Papa aa rahe hai.
2nd: Abe stupid, ye pados wale uncle hai, papa kabhi raincoat nahi pehante.

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A priest saw a girl removing her blouse. The priest prayed: God, please close my eyes. When he opened his eyes, the girl was naked This time he prayed God please close your eyes.

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Boss had 2 select a secretary 4 himself.4 girls came 4 d interview. thought of a question!!
Q:what is d difference b/w 2 mouths of a girl?
1.one talks & other not
2.one is horizontol & other is vertical
3.one is hairy other is not
4.one is 4 me and other is for my boss.
Boss selected the last 1!! ;->

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A man on a station selling SHILAJIT KI GOLI

AAIYE MEHERBAN SUNIYE KATARDAN SHILAJIT GOLI KA CHAMATKAR
5 GOLI KA PACKET HAI 1 GOLI KA EK RUPIYA 5 GOLI KA PAACH RUPIYA
YEH GOLI BANANE KA TARIKA NEPAL KI PAHADI BANDRA KI KHADI 12 BHADVO AUR 12 RANDIYO KE PALAP SE BANIYII GOLI KA MISHRAN HAI YEH GOLI KHANE KA TARIKA ..
1 GOLI ANDAR LUND BORIBANDER
2 GOLI KHAO PHAT PHATI CHALAYOO
3 GOLI KHAOO TEN FOOT LAMBA KARO
4 GOLI KHAO 4 FOOT LAMBA KARO
5 GOLI KHAAO SEEDHA AURAT KE PAAS JAO AURAT BOLE ARE TUM CHODTA HAI KI MITTI KHODTA HAI

AAO AAO JISKO GOLI CHAIYE AAGE AAO JISKO NAHI CHAIYE AAPNI MAA CHUDAOO..... ....

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Agar

Aap

Larkiyo'n Se Hamesha Ghirey Rehna Chahte Hyn. . .

Agar Aap Chahte Hyn

K Wo Aapka "PRODUCT"

Haath Me Lekar Muunh Main Daaley. . .







Tou. . .










Paani- Puuri Ka Thela Laga Lo Yaar . . .

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Sardar used to fuck sardarni using milk as lubricant.
Later she was rushed to hospital, when the Doctor came
out of OT said, "no baby or baba, just 1kg MAWA."

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Girlfriends Are Appetizers. . . . Taste Good At Any Time. . . .

Mistresses Are Tomyams. . . . Hot & Spicy Eaten Frequently. . . .

Wives Are Maggie. . . . Eaten When There's Nothing To Eat. . . . ;->

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Lecturer: Which comes 1st. . . "SUN Or MOON" . . . ? ? ?



Student:Obviously MOON. . . ! ! ! !


Lecturer: How. . . ?



Student : Only after
"Honey-MOON"
"SON" Will come. . . . ;->

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BOY:
Larke Is Dunya Main Bohat Takleef Uthate Hain . . .

GIRL:
Nahi Larkian Bohat Takleef Uthati Hain

BOY:
Acha Wo Kaise. . . !

GIRL:
Kia Kabhi Koi Larka Pragnent Hua Hai . . . ? ?

BOY:
Nahi, Par Kabhi Kisi Larki Ka Lun Jeans Ki Zip Main Phansa Hai . . . ! ! ! ;->

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Q.) Why does a penis have a hole in the end?
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A.) So men can be open minded. . . .

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Ye Chodan-Pur Ki Basti Hai

Yahan Choot Lund Se Sasti Hai

Jab Raat K Bara Bajte Hyn

Sab Lund Pukara Kerte Hyn

Ehsaan Kisi Ka Lete Nahi

Haatho'n Se Guzara Kerte Hyn

Jab Yaad Chooto'n Ki Aati Hai

Uth Uth K Dobara Kerte Hain . . . ;->

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Girl hostel me phone aaya : Reeta HAI KYA ?
Warden ne pucha :aage kya lagati hai ?
Jawab aaya - Ab to pata nahi Pehle SARSON KA TEL lagati thi..

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Bhosri Plaza Hotel
"MENU CARD"
Grilled mummay;
Achari lund;
Phuddi of the day;
Tandoori bund
Lullian sirkay waali:
Chilly choot;
Tattay mughlai;
Gori bund da halwa;
Nargisi tattay;
Phuddi pakoray;
Lund folooda;
Mard makhan naan;
Afghani gand kabab;
Daigay mammay;
Lund khara masala;
Bhosri fried rice;
Melted tutti cream;
Peeshab up;

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Q : 2 homo ladke khubsurat ladki ko dekh kar kya bolenge ???
A : yaar ladki aisi hai to uska bhai kaisa honga ???

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Lund:"Rehta hu bhai rehta hu, do taango ke beech mein rehta hoon,
jab bi chut dekhta hun to uth ke salaam karta hoon"
Chut:"Rehti hu bhai rehti hu, do taango ke beech mein rehti hu, jab
bi lund dekhti hu, muh khol kar swagat karti hun"
Jhaten:"Rehte hai bhai rehte hai,do tangon ke beech me rehte hain, chut
aur lund ke ladai mein ek do shaheed hote rehte hain

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While Making Love . . .

Boy Says : Darling Let's Do 68 . . . ! ! !

68 . . . ! ! ! What's That. . .? Girl Asks

Boy: You Do It To Me And I'll Owe You One . . . ;->

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Height Of Reality. . . .

















An Actress Being Fucked By A Producer Without Using A Condom. . . Saying That She Has To Play The Role Of Pragnent Lady In He Next Movie. . .

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Some More Heights Of . . .




Height Of Sophistication: Sucking Nipples With A Straw. . . . .



Height Of Technology: Condom With Zip. . . .


Height Of Penetration: A Baby Girl Born Pragnant. . . .


Height Of Noise: Two Skeletons Fucking In A Tin Room. . . .


Height Of Patience: A Female Lying Naked Under A Banana Tree And Hoping For Banana To Fall In Her Pussy. . . .


Height Of Coincidence: And The Banana Fallen In. . . .



Height Of Comparison: Pissing Infront Of Niagra Fall. . .

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Son : Dad Aap Ki Pent Ki Zip Khuli Hui Hai

Dad: Aise Nahi Kehte, Bolo K Aap Ka Make-Up Box Khula Hua Hai . . .

Son: Acha. . . Aap Ka Make-Up Box Khula Hua Hai Aur Lipstick Nazar Aa Rahi hai . . . ;->

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Tawaif: Sex Karogay? khush kar dongi!

Chungre: Haan lekin Meri Bv ki Tarah Karwao gi to karonga?

Tawaif: wo kaisay karwati hay?Chungre : Free main....

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sOme QueStIOns n AnswErS

Q. Whats the difference between 'ohh' and 'ahh'?
A. About 4 inches.

Q. What have a KFC and a women got in common?
A. Once you finished with the legs and breasts you are just left with a greasy box to chuck your bone in.


Q. Why do women have two holes so close together?
A. In case you miss.


Q. If you are having sex with two women and one more woman walks in, what do you have?
A. Divorce proceedings, most likely.


Q. Why do women prefer old gynecologists?
A. They have shaky hands!

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Teacher: Name the thing which carries more weight but has very less weight
Student: Your "BRA"!!

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Man: chalo, aaj kuch naya karein
Wife: kya kare?
Man: aaj main tumhare kaan(ear) mein daaloonga
Wife: nahi ... nahi... main behri ho gayi toh?
Man: Maderchod!!! !!!!!!ab tak goongi hui kya?

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Shohar BV se susral me: Aao chudai karen BV:Na na ye mere Baap ka ghar he Shohar:Kia mere Baap ka ghar CHAKLA ha jo har raat Chudwane k liye tayar rehti ho?

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Raghupati Ragav Raja Raam
Neeche Seeta Uper Raam
Seeta Boli Bas Ker Raam
Laxman Ko Bhi Kerna Hai Kaam
Kerte Kerte Ho gaye Shaam
3 Months Main nikal Aaye Hanumaan

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What Did Amitabh Tell His Son Afer His Wedding....?

"Beta Abhi(shake) Kerne k Din gaye, Aur (Aish) Kerne K Din Aa Gaye...."

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A Patan tried to commit suiside

Someone askd: Y r u doing this...?

Pathan: Humara Bivi Humara Dost K saath Bhaag gaya hai Aur Hum Apne dost k Bagher zinda nahi reh sakta....!!! !

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husband hands over a 500 rs. note to wife
Husband: Humne kabhi ye kaam free mein nahi kiya

wife hands back 200 rs. n says
wife: Humne bhi jaan pehchaan walo se 300 se zyada nahi liye

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A girl has many dreams and wants one special person to fulfill all those dreams, but a guy has only one dream and wants all girls to fulfill his ONE dream!!!

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BOY:
BUS Aur LARKI Ek Jesey Hotey Hain,
Ek Jati Hai To Doosri Aa Jati Hai.
GIRL:
LARKEY Aur AUTO RICKSHAW Ek Jesey Hotey Hain,
Ek Bulao To Char Chaley Atey Hain.

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Pathan BV K Liye Phool Laya To BV Ney Kaprey Utarey Aur Tangain Khol Kar Bistar Pay Lait Gayee!
Pathan2His Wife:
Mard Chod Ghar Main GULDAAN Nahi Hai Kia ?

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Cinema Main AURATON Key HAQOOQ Par Film Chal Rahi Thi.
1 AURAT Ney Josh Main Naara Lagaya,
Aaj Ki Aurt Kia Nahi Kar Sakti?
.
Ek Awaz Aayee,
DEEWAAR PAR PISHAAB

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Sardarni 2 Sardar:
Tussi Hazaron Main Aik Ho.
Sardar Ney Kuss Key Aik Thappar Sardarni Ko Lagaya Aur Bola:
KAMEENI BAQI 999 KON HAIN

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1 khan Plane mian safar kar raha tha hostes ny us k zor dar thapper mara,
khan k sath jo admi betha tha wo bohat pareshan hoa khan sy bola tum ne kuch bola nahi phir tum ko kyon mara,
khan sharma k bola us ki qamiz gand main phasi hoi thi main ne nikali to usne ghusse se dekha,
main ne wapis phasa di ;->

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When Kareena & priyanka went to KBC,
Shahrukh askd : what do u like the most in Kbc?

They both lifted their skirt n said: Fastest Finger first...
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Mubarik ho

govt na tari sun li


bari tension ma tha tu

mera daikh kar gusa karta tha

ab khush ho ja



Market mein

1inch ki Lulli wala condom b aa gya hae! :P

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Teacher: what is common between Indra Gandhi & Sonia Gandhi?

Student: After thinking: Sir, nipples of both had been sucked by Rajive Gandhi..-

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1st Boy 2nd Sey:
“Main Aur Meri Girl Friend Shaadi Kar Rahey Hain”
2nd Boy:
WoW, Shadi Kab Hai?.
1st Boy:
“Meri 7-Oct Aur Uski 13-Nov Ko

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Dhoka Mila Jab Peyar Main,
Zindagi Main Udassi Chha Gayee,
Socha Tha Chhor Dain Gey Iss Rah Ko,
Kambakht Muhalley Main Doosri Aa Gayee.

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