Non Veg. Jokes Part - 7

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Preeto comes nude in front of theguests while serving the halwa.
Banta shouts: What’s this?
Preeto: Recipe book me likha tha ‘Serve hot without dressing’
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AIK AURAT APNAY BACHAY KO DOODH PILANAY SAY PEHLAY APNAY MUM'MAY ACCHI TARHA HILATEE HAE, JAB US KA HUSBAND POOCHTA HAE KAE YEH TUM KYA KAR RAHEE HO TO VO KEHTEE HAE KAE "MAE BACHAY KO MILK SHAKE DAE RAHEE HO" ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -----
Define BREAST?.

B - Beautiful
R - Round Shaped
E - Equipment
A - Amazingly
S - Soft with
T - Tasty Milk........

Peo Sir Utha kay....
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What's the diff between a Lollipop and a Penis ?
The Lollipop gets smaller with each lick and PENIS gets bigger with each lick.
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Names of Penis With Ages......
01-05 = Nono
06-10 = Phunno
11-14 = Lulli
15-20 = Lund
21-25 = Pyaasa
26-35 = Shikari
36-50 = Naram Garam
51-60 = Kaam chor
61-75 = Yaadein
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Girl: If u'll try to kiss me, main shor macha doongi.
Boy: Lekin yahan to dur-dur tak koi nahin hai.
Girl: I know but formality to karni hi padegi…
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Generation Next Motto: Na hum shaadi karenge, na apne bachchon ko karne denge.
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HUSBAND: DARLING MAE AAJ SAY PEHLAY 10 LARKIYOU KAE SAATH SOYA HO

WIFE: AB YEH SHADI AESAY TO HO NAHEE GAYEE, ZAHIR HAE KUND'LEYA MELEE THEE TO HE RISHTA HOVA THA
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HINDU TEACHER: BAE'TA, GAYEE [COW] KO KABHEE JAN'WAR MAT KEH'NA, YEH HAMAREE MAA HAE MAAA [GAO'MATA]

STUDENT: SIR AAP KI MAA KO KOI SARAK PAR CHOOD RAHA HAE
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ATTENDENCE:

1- PAP'PU?

Present

2- Dab'bu?

Present

3- Mun'na?

Present

4- Chun'na?

Present

5- Pandu?

Present

6- Gandu?

Gandu??

Gandu???

Gandu??????? ???????

ABBY JOKES PARHNA CHOORH AUR PRESENT BOOL TERA NAAM LIA JAA RAHA HAI ATTENDENCE MAIN........ ......... ..lolx
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MALIKA SHERAWAT AUR GANDHI MAE KYA FARAQ HAE?

GAANDHI NAE MULK KAE LEYEH KAFRAY OTAARAY THAY AUR MALIKA SHERAWAT NAE MULK KAE LOGO KAE LEYEH
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Nazuk Choot walee Larki
Itnay Lund mat ghu'sao
Thak Jao gi

Kaanch say nazuk Choot Tumhari
Phat gayee to Pach'tao gi

Aray tum kya jaano!
Lund ghu'sanay kae leyeh
Aankhay baeechna parhtay hae
Rishtay bhoolna parhtay hae
Thak Jao gi

Kaanch say nazuk Choot Tumhari
Phat gayee to Pach'tao gi!
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LARKA: DARLING, KAL RAAT JAB KISS KARNAY KAE BAAD TUM NAE CHEWING GUM MAERAY MOU MAE DAALI THEE TO MUJHAY BAUHAT ACCHA LAGA THAA,

LARKI: BHARWAY VO CHEWING NAHEE TUMHARAY CONDOM THAA
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A Sardar was arrested in a Political Rally,B'coz
He Saw a Lady Journalist,having Badge On her chest,Written "PRESS"
So He Pressed...
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Larkion Ki Adaein Aaj Tak Samaj Nai Ayi . . . .

" Kuch Kehdo Tu Muo Phula Leti Hain Aur Kuch Kardo Tu Peait Phula Leti Hain . . . . "
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BAETE: MAA MAA YEH LUND KYA HOTA HAE

MAA: BAETA AGAR AAP ACCHI LARKI BAN GAYEE TO AAP KO BHEE MELAY GA, AUR AAP KO KHUD HE PATA CHAL JAYEE GA

BAETEE: AGAR MAE ACCHI LARKI NA BANEE TO

MAA: TAB AAP KO KAEE MELAY GAY
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Utho Bharvon Aankhen Knolo
Bistar choro aur lund dholo

itna chodna theek nahin
gand pe thookna theek nahin hai

Sooraj Nikla Gandoo Bhage
Un mein INDIA tha sab se aage
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QUESTION: FILM "SALAM NAMASTAY" SAY HAMAY KYA SABAQ MIL'TA HAE

ANSWER: KABHEE BHEE AUSTRALIAN CONDOMS PAR AE'TAE'BAAR NA KARO
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SHAH-JAHAN NAE TAJ MAHAL KI

DEVARO KO DAEKHA,

KINARO KO DAEKHA

KHER'KE'YOU KO DAEKHA

DARWA'ZO KO DAEKHA

JHO'MAR KO DAE'KHA

KALEEN KO DAEKHA

AUR DAEKH KAR KAHA

BEHAN'CHOOD BAUHAT KHARCHA HO GEYA HAE!!!!
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1st BOY: ABY YAAR, US LUND WALAY QATIL NAE AIK AUR AURAT KO CHOOD KAR US KA MURDER KAR DEYA
2ND BOY: LUND WALA QATIL? KOUN?
1st BOY: ABAY US KA LUND NAHEE LONDON HAE.
2ND BOY: LONDON HAE! KYA MATLAB?
1ST BOY: ABAY US KA LUND ITNA BARA HAE KAE POORA LONDON SAMA JAYEE
2ND BOY: BHOS'REE KAE VO HAE KOUN?
1ST BOY: ABAY JAB US KA LUND KISII KI BHEE CHOOT MAE JATA HAE TO 8 FEET GEHRA GAD'DHAA PAR JAA'TA HAE
2ND BOY: MADAR'CHOOD, VO HAE KOUN?
1ST BOY: SALAY 10 10 AURTO KO AIK HE DAFA MAE LINE SAY CHOOD DAALTA HAE
2ND BOY: GAANDU, VO HAE KOUN?
1ST BOY: SALAY KAE LUND SAY MONEY NAHEE SAMANDAR NIKALTA HAE KAE KOI BHEE BEH JAYEE
2ND BOY: BHARWAY, VO HAE KOUN?
1ST BOY: SALA APNAY LUND PAR 10 10 AURTO KO BETHAA LAETA HAE
2ND BOY: DAL'LAY, VO HAE KOUN?
1ST BOY: JAB US KA LUND CHOOT MAE JAA'TA HAE TO CHOOT KAE ITNAY TUKRAY HO JAATAY HAE, JAESAY LAGTA HO KAE KESEE NAE BOMB PHAAR DEYA HO
2ND BOY: RANDI KI OLAAD, VO HAE KOUN?, BATA BHEEE DAE, LUND NA HO GEYA CRUSE MISILE HO GEYA, VO HAE KOUN
1ST BOY: VO HAE......... ......... ..

VO HAE......... ......... ..VO HAE......... ......... ..

VO HAE......... ......... ..VO HAE......... ......... ..

VO HAE......... ......... ..VO HAE......... ......... ..

VO HAE......... ......... ..VO HAE......... ......... ..

VO HAE......... ......... ..VO HAE......... ......... ..

VO HAE......... ......... ..VO HAE......... ......... ..

VO HAE......... ......... ..VO HAE......... ......... ..

1ST BOY: JIS KA TU MAIL PARH RAHA HAI.
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Boy to girl : tum gaana boaht acha gaati ho
Girl to boy : nahi main to sirf bathroom singer hon
Boy : to phir bolao na kabi mehfil jamain ge
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What is the dumbest part on a man's body? The penis. It has a head with no brain, it hangs out with two nuts and it lives around the corner from an asshole!
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Chaho to hamein bhula dena.Chaho to hamara naam dil se mita dena.Par jab tanhai mein hamari yaad aye to rona mat. sirf 1 baar apni gaand mein ungli daal ke hila lena.
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DOCTOR: AAP KAE TO SAARAY GHUTNAY CHIL GAYEE HAE, AAP DOGGY STYLE KAE ELAAWA KOI DOSRI POSITION TRY KARAY

LADY: DOCTOR SAHAAB MAE TO DIFFERNT POSITION TRY KAR SAKTEE HO, BUT DOG NAHEE KAR SAKTA
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Aaj mae aap ko SALAAD bana'nay ka tareeqa bata'ta hu. Sab say pehlay aap aik KHEERA lejeyeh
.
.
.
.
.
.
..
.
.
.
.
Agar Dard hu raha hae to Nikaal lae, otherwise Enjoy Karay.
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Arz Kya hai....
EK jhalak kafi hai DIL ka mareeZ banane Ke liye,
Tune itni barhi SHALWAAR pehni hai ek
Chhoti si CHEEZ chupane ke liye....
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Pajamey mein meray yeh kia hoo raha hai
Chota tha pehley, Ab Bara ho raha hai.
Youn too hai yeah Mohazzib buhat,
EHTARAM mein TUMHARAY Khara hoo raha hai...
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teri aankhooo main aansoooaur chehre pe hasi hai

wah wah......... ......... ..

teri aankhoon main aansoo aur chehray pe hasi hai..

wah wah......... ......... ..

aesa lagta hai jaisay teri LULLI zip main phasi hai...
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one night a boy asked his girlfriend: "darling r u
free tonight"
his girlfriend shouted and replied "have i ever
charged u before?"
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after a train passed a tunnel, a sardar screamed "who
squeezed my
wifie's
boobs?"
"chalo sab line mein khade ho jao. ek ek karke firse
dabao, finger
print
lena hai"
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sardarni : i want good manners in bed just like at the
dinner table.
sardar climbs slowly into the bed, smiles and says:
"honey, would you pass the boobs please"
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cock and cat were crossing a bridge.
cat slips and falls into river.
cock can't stop laughing.

moral of the story?
wherever there is a wet pussy, there's a happy cock.
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sardar explaining to son why not to go to prosti's.
"puttar u go 2 prosti, tainu aids ho jayegi.
fir teri wife nu,
fir mainu,
aur fir saare gaon nu..."
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Chand safarishnew

Gand py Kharish jokarta tumhari
Deta main Lunsay khuja
Sharmo haya ko ,lun pay charha kay
karna hay Bund ko tbah

Zid hai ab to hai Bund main ghusana
Karna ha Lun ko Fannah..
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DaY 1
Ram call Shyam : Sarya hai ?
Shyam : Haan Hai
Ram : GanD Main le Lo
Day 2
Ram : Sarya hai?
Shyam : Nahi hai
Ram : Gand Main Le lia kya ?
Day 3
Ram : Sarya hai
Shyam : Hai bhi Aur Nahi bhi
Ram : Kya Andar Bahar kar rahe ho
Day 4
Shyam calls Ram : Sarya hai ?
Ram : Kion Kia Gaand main lena hai kia
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18 Years Ki larki K set hone se sex hone tak k 18 nakhre
1 mera peecha mat karo
2 main sharif larki hoon
3 bas ek baar kahoongi i love u
4 sirf ek baar miloongi
5 kuch kerna nahi
6 koi dekh le ga
7 bas upper se
8 paint mat utaro
9 bas ek baar hi kerwaongi
10 sharam aa rahi hai
11 buhat lamba hai
12 itna mota main nahi le sakti
13 zor se mat dalna
14 buhat dard ho raha hai
15 boobs ko chooso
16 kamar ko pakar k daaalo
17 zor se dakha mat maaro
18 bahar mat nikalo
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Nangi Larki Sardar g se Boli 20 rupay ki mithaae do
Sardar g ghaur se daikh rahe thay larki boli "kabhi nangi larki nahi dekhi kya?"
Sardar g : "Dekhi tu hai magar main ye soch raha hoon tu paisay kahan se nikaale gi "
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Kon kehta hai hum main judaaai ho gi
yeh afwa kisi maderchod ne urai ho gi
Hum to rahain ge aap ki gand main ghus ker
Umeed hai itni jaga to aap ne bachai ho gi
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Foran ek kaaam karain

paint utaarain

under wear utaarain

Gand pe teil lagain

aur aag laga dain

jab deni nahi hai to uska kia faida....... ....
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Kion har baar mosam ki terha badal jaate ho
Har naye saaal humaaara dil dukhate ho
Yeh baat sun ker humaari rooh tak kanp gai
Ae dost tum sirf 5 rupay main gand marate ho
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LAwyer : Is aadni ne aap k saaath kia kya behan ji?
Lady : Is Ne pehle mujhe giraya
lawyer : us k baad behan ji?
lady : phir meri kammez phar di
lawyer : us k baad behan ji ?
lady : phir meri bra ko phaara
lawyer : phir behan ji?
lady : phir meri shalwaaar phari
lawyer : phir behan ji?
lady : phir kia , Aap Ki Behan chud gaye
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Kajol said to Aamir khan in fanna
"Meri Chuut MAin Tere Loray ko panah mil jaye
Tere Loray Pe Meri Chuut Fana Ho Jaye"

AaMir reply : "Chodne de Aaj Hum Ko Teri Chuut suJane de
Khol De Taangain Apni Aur Mujh ko Andar Jaane De
Hai Chuut Main Qaid jo Darya Wo choot Jayega
Hai Itna Dard K Tera Bister Red Ho Jaye Ga
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The "F" Rulez....... ...

FiNd Her
Friend Her
flirt Her
Finger Her
Fuck Her
Forget Her
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Sarddar And Sardarni In Bus
Sardarni: suno ji , Peeche waala mere blouse main haath daaal raha hai
Sardar : oy tu fikar mat ker , uss ko kia pata batwa to mere paas hai
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1 aadmi k ghar 7 larkiyan paida ho gain
Us ne paper main add diya
"Larka paida kerne ka tareeqa batao"
Bengal se letter aaya : " Fish Khilao "
Haryaana se letter aaya : " Milk shake do "
Punjaab se letter aaya : "Lassi do "
Utter Pradesh se letter aaya "1 moqa humain de"
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A Girl Tells Her Boy Friend Inside the Cinema : "Mere Saath Wala MUTH maar raha hai"
Boy says : Ignore Him
Girl says : I can't ............ . Coz He Is Using My Hand
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Nipple Nipple Don't Be Far
can I Press U In My Car
Up Above The Chest So High
Always Milky Never Dry
Let Me Suck U Don't Feel Shy
In The Brassier U Will Die
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The Oscar Nominee Of The Best XXX Hindi Movies

Haseena Ki Gand Main Paseena
Land Apna chut Parayee
Pati Fauj Main Patni Mauj Main
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Usne Kaha Kon Ho Tum?
Mene Kaha Hasrat Tumhari
Usne Kaha Karte Ho Kya?
Mene Kaha Pooja Tumhari
Usne Kaha Chahte Ho Kya?
Mene Kaha Mohabbat Tumhari
Usne Kaha Pachtaogay
Mene Kaha Qismat Humhari
Usne Kaha Married Houn
Mene Kaha Maa Ki Choot Tumhari
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Wife: (too much angry) "mein yeh ghar chor kar ja rahi hoon"
Husb: Acha jao..merey LUND pe charho!
wife: pur tumhari yehi khubsurt batein mujhe nahi janey daiti
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Larki ne Bili ki tasveer wli shirt pehni hui thi

Larka ghoornay lgaLarki: kbhi Bili nhi dkhi

Larka bola: dekhi to hai, lekin doodh ki hifazat kartay huye pehli baar dekh raha hoon...
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Ek sawaal: Duniya ka sabse mushkil kaam kya hai?

Jawaab: Soye huye pappu par condom charhaana.
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Q: Larkay walay larki wallon say larki ka haath kab maangtay hain ?

Kab ..?

A: Jab Larkay ka apna haath thak jaata hai :>
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A gal with his boyfriend opened her legs inviting him 2 fuck n asked: Hamare baby ka naam kya hoga?
He wears a condom n says: Iske baad bhi hoga to ‘Jadugar’